The Lemures Files
  Guest Article: November 10, 1998

Top Ten Things I Abhor About Spoonies

By: Janelle Jimenez

These are the top ten things I abhor about spoonies. What are spoonies? Just some dumb term I started calling all the StuPid mOONIES (and ain't spoon a cool word anyway?). Now, don't take offense if you fit into one of these...I'm sure we all do (or have). But, if ya fall into all of the categories...I personally think you should take a gun to your head (or I'll do it :P). Some of the things I hate the most where the things I actually did (cry ;_;) But, these have been really REALLY getting on my nerves, so here we go.

10: People who say the Japanese version is stupid because the voices sound dumb

    Well, that is your god given right to say, HOWEVER, I strongly feel it is a comment made from sheer ignorance. The voices sound dumb? Either you're a racist who thinks foreign languages are primative and incomprehensible (which is a whole nother column) OR you just are shocked by the high pitch of the voices. I hope to god most people fall into the latter. I felt the same way, but you get used to it. These people can ACT. They get paid LOTS of money for their job, so they are VERY talented. I hate anime dubs because 1. you always lose something in a translation and 2. the voice actor loses what was originally intended. Take for example the Slayers dub. Zelgadis in the original is NOT monotone and lifeless. Zelgadis in the dub is. However, Slayers dub is one of the better dubs I've ever seen. Anyway, if you really hate the Original version (which is the next number) then find something else to pick at.
9: People who hate the Original Sailor Moon, but LOVE the Dub
    That doesn't make sense to me at all. If you can't understand Japanese, fine. If you HATE the Japanese, then why the hell are you watching anime? I don't give a damn what you say, anime is part of Japanese culture. If you don't like it for some patriotic American-stuff-is-always-better-even-though-it-was-thought-up,-drawn, -and-just-about-everything-else'd-in-Japan sort of reason, then well, I guess that's your right too.
8: People who harass me about the Gateway
    Yes, I know I'm slow. But, I do have a life. I try to update it as often as possible, but I really can't. Is harassing me really going to help?
7: People who flame me (or anyone) for who their Senshi choices are
    Ooh, isn't this hypocritical, I bet you are saying. Well, buzz, wrong. Altho I have a Mercury Anti-Shrine, it doesn't mean I hate people who like her. That would be absolutely stupid and allowing an anime rule my life. Scary that people actually choose friends on the basis of fictional characters, ne? I can hate characters I want, I can like characters I want, so can you. Someone tell me how this REALLY matters in life....
6: People who think I hate them because they like Mercury
    1. I don't care who you like, it's your choice, your no way can it possibly harm me. 2. I don't care enough about Mercury, Sailor Moon, or anime for that matter to judge people on the basis of something as trivial as that. C'mon, it's not like you said you were a Republican! (Just kidding..^^;)
5: The hordes of people who hate the AQ
    Here's my chance to defend these guys. They have done more good for the Sailormoon internet than anyone else has. They've raised standards of webpages, when there was none. Until they came along, someone could slap 5 pictures on their site (remotely linked, I might add) make up some crap and it was a site. Sorry, not quite. It's an insult to the show to make such crappy sites. Also, how can ANYONE say they hate Sailor Moon? Would YOU spend years building a site on the advancement of something you hate? Take my Anti-Mercury shrine. Jackie & I got bored and tired of updating it. Now it's just a celebrity death match arena. As far as I can see, you only have 2 real reasons to hate the AQ. 1. They voted your site worst and 2. You LIKE seeing pure crap when you should be seeing something of quality.
4: People who Say Sailor Moon is the Best Ever
    I think it's one thing to say your favorite, but it's FAR from being the best ever. I'm gunna get people yelling at me about how really hate Sailormoon. Well, actually, you'd be pretty close. If you think SM is the best anime ever you've obviously never seen anything else except Dragonball Z. You are also unaware that there are thousands of anime/manga titles out there. Anime has been around for over 30 years, you cannot tell me a show that uses stock characters, has a fairly predictable plot, and whose animation really isn't that good can be the best ever. Yes, it is entertaining and good. Yes, it is probably the most popular animated series to date. But no, it is FAR from being the best. I hate getting in arguments with people when they don't even know any other anime except for Samurai Pizza Cats and Pokemon and Ranma 1/2. If you like shoujo, there's better shoujo. If you like the music, there's better music. If you like the characters, well, most are the typical anime girl stereotypes (ditzy leader, cute quiet smart girl, beautiful bitchy one..). Although, I will agree that the cast of characters is better than most series have. So maybe you can say the characters are the best ever, that one's debatable, but feasible.
3: People who take my Anti-Mercury Shrine seriously
    What is WRONG with you?! It's a freaking joke. Haven't you ever seen Celebrity Death Match? No one wails about how their favorite actor died, because no one's all fun and games. At first, yes, it has a hate site, but it isn't. It even says we'll spread our "propaganda" which already IMPLIES that we're speaking half-truths. My god, if you think we want to kill people who are like Mercury you are on crack and need to check if you're vision of reality is correct. I've had Mercury fans tell me they thought it was hysterical, because...OH! They have a sense of humor!
2: People who think I'm a bitch
    Once again, another one of those, it's your god given right thing. However, I really dislike people who think I'm a bitch because I'm not afraid to voice my opinions. To those people I say, continue living your life as a drone for society. It'll be people like me you'll have to answer to at work. Sorry to the lil girl who emailed me and told me to keep my opinions to myself, but in the real world, you can't really do that. If you don't like what I have to say, don't listen. Don't ever return to my webpage, I won't be sad, really. The entire site wasn't made by someone hung up on herself, it was made by someone who's extremely sarcastic. I have never had anyone who's really known me tell me I was mean or bitchy, because I'm not. I'm spirited, sarcastic, confrontational, intimidating at times, but I would NEVER bitch at someone unless they started it. I am so damn sick of people emailing me telling me they don't like how mean I am and I should take it out of my page. Excuse me? Since when do YOU dictate my life? Out of the 200000 people who've seen my site, only 10 have complained which means get a freakin sense of humor!
1: People who refuse to acknowledge Haruka & Michiru are lesbians.
    Get over it, they are. Naoko Takeuchi (ya know, the creator of SM?) said so herself at the San Diego comic carnival. Sailormoon is FULL of lesbians/transexuals/crossdressers/etc. If you are homophobic, you have no place watching anime in the first place. Almost every single anime I can name of has a gay character. Let's see, El Hazard, Fushigi Yuugi, Rurouni Kenshin, Card Captor Sakura, Shoujo Kakumei Utena, Here is Greenwood, Escaflowne--and yes, Sailormoon. Why? Because Japanese aren't as weird about it as we are...and the girls think it's interesting to a story. Something fairly popular in Japan is an anime/manga style called "yaoi" which is typically about male lovers and the doomed relationship they have. So, if you can't take it, then either grow up or stop watching.

Comments on this article can be sent to: Janelle Jimenez.

Comments made on this page are opinions of the author. They are not necessarily shared by Tripod and the Amazoness Quartet.

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